Mourning.

I know I am not suppose to say things like this, that it does not "help" or make people have warm fuzzies, etc., etc., etc., blah, blah, blah.

However, I AM NOT DOING VERY WELL.

So I ask??? Is there a correct way to mourn? Am I suppose to be doing something I am not, and not feeling Angry, lonely, lost, emotionally unstable, withdrawn, and questioning almost EVERYTHING in my life? Am I not suppose to be doing that? Because that is right where I am.

So this girl is getting an "F" in the mourning department of life. A big, Fat, Hairy F, and franky I don't really care!!

Congratulations Sarah!!!

On Saturday May 7th our daughter, Sarah, graduated from the University of Wyoming in Laramie with a Bachelors Degree in Special Education. We are so very proud of this woman... so driven, focused, fun, loving and loves life. After she finished everything she needed for her degree she decided to move forward towards her graduate degree in the same field so she decided she was not going to walk for this graduation since she was not done with school yet. We wanted her to walk SO bad to celebrate her accomplishment so we bribed her. We said we will give you a laptop if you walk.... she said YES. hah.. I love bribes..

So in the middle of crazy sadness (as you see in the below blogs) we attended a well deserved celebration and had a great time being with Sarah. We went to dinner in Fort Collins, Colorado and we all decided we want to live there. Absolutely beautiful place.

We love you Sarah and are so proud of you. Debbie ALWAYS says "Education buys you freedom" so keep plugging away your almost there!!!!!

a blur....

The last three weeks is a complete whirlwind to me. I stayed with Mike's ALOT the last month and most of the last two weeks of his life with him, . . It was a precious, bitter, unforgettable time and I can't even begin to write what it was like. I would never take that time back. Sam and my kids haven't had a home cooked meal or had anything that resembled a "normal" life for almost a month but they were so supportive of me being up there with Mike. I love them even more for it. Mike had a HUGE turn out to his funeral, HUGE!

I wanted to share a few pictures of Mikes funeral with you

These are Mikes riding boots, jacket etc. We had several of his "personal" stuff around the funeral home. This is the flowers Mike's sisters got him. Its a wheel with a missing spoke (meaning someone is missing) These are Mikes gloves and goggles and bandanna he use to ride with. after the funeral we walked outside and there were a bunch of Harley's parked in front of the Hearst, they were there to escort Mike to the cemetery. It was one of my favorite parts. We were right behind the harley and the hearst and pulled into the cemetary and there were a line of cars so far that we could not see the end. It still gives me goosebumps. We walked out and all the Harley riders were standing there with hats off and waiting for their fallen brother.
The flower's at Mikes funeral were GORGEOUS. The day before he died my Mom, Michelle and I went out and found his gold panning pan in his shed with his horns and his pheasant feathers, we gathered them and had them put in the spray that layed on top of his casket.
This is the only (bad) picture we have of all of Mike's sister during the viewing.
Mike's kids, Jack and Janae, with Brock and Taylor.
The flowers from Mike's nieces and nephews. That is Mikes fishing pole in the flowers.
My cousin, Sally, made a video of Mike with 100's of pictures. This is Brock watching the video remembering his Uncle Mike.
This is the first time I have lost someone this close to me and boy, what a heart wrenching experience. Mike and I planned his funeral the week before he died, we tweaked it a little here and there but I know Mike would have LOVED it. I am home now and I go places and can't believe life is just going on, I kinda want to stand in the grocery store line and scream at the top of my lung.. 'HOW ARE ALL OF YOU GUYS GOING ON, MY BROTHER JUST DIED'...

So if your calling me and I don't answer, or if you are emailing me and I don't reply, I am just trying to get back amongst the living.... I am getting there a little bit each day.

Love you Mike!

Michael Dean Dahle

Michael Dean Dahle

February 16, 1962 - May 6, 2011

After a heroic 5 year battle with Multiple Myeloma (cancer) my brother passed away surrounded by family and friends. I was lucky enough to spend most of the last 2 weeks of his life with him. I will miss him. This picture was taken about 5 days before he returned to his heavenly home. I LOVE YOU MIKE!!

I hope the fishing is good, and I will see you on the flip side Mike, LOVE YOU!

Surreal...

In Jcpenny and over the loud speaker you hear. There is a severe thunderstorm outside right now, you can get a flashlight at the front counter in case we lose poser.

(thought to self) "Wow it must be bad"

my phone is going off like CRAZY in my bag.

(thought to self) "let me just buy these few things I have for Sam and I will get my phone, where am I going to go if it is raining like crazy and SEVERE thunder storm"

Phone still going off like crazy. It's my sister Michelle.

(Michelle) "I just heard from Mike (our brother). His cancer has won they give him less than thirty days if his calcium does not drop, and zero - six months if it does. It's spreading fast and they are not giving him any more chemo. They are getting hospice in to start working with him to die."

(thought to self) I can hear the hail hitting the roof now and the lights just went out in JcPenny and I can't see a foot in front of me, my brother is dying and I just bought $86 worth of stuff for Sam and I have no idea what I got him.

Looking out the front window of JcPenny I start running to my car as tree's are getting knocked down, my ear is full of water, and I am in heals and trying not to cry because I just got the news I knew was coming any second.

(thought to self) What do I do? Do I go to Preston, Do I sit here and cry, or do I try to get the hell out of the storm that is hitting Layton like the plague.

Tears start falling down my face, like gracefully falling, not like the ugly cry I usually cry, just pouring off my chin. A piece of cardboard from the storm of the century is stuck on my windshield so I am trying to get it off.

on the radio...
"Now I’m feelin so fly like a G6, like a G6"

Call my Mom. Trying to drive in this storm from hell, process everything and avoid tree branches that are falling down.
say to my Mom crying "I am just so sad, Mom, I have to get home, I will call ya later."

Have an overwhelming feeling I HAVE to talk to Mike right this second, I mean not in 10 minutes when I get home but right this second. Call him... no answer. Sitting on the freeway between Layton and home because there is a traffic jam from this storm. It's hailing again now. BAD!

radio:
"Poppin bottles in the ice, like a blizzard
When we drink we do it right gettin slizzard
Sippin sizzurp in my ride, like Three 6
Now I’m feelin so fly like a G6
Like a G6, Like a G6
Now I’m feelin so fly like a G6"

Get home, let the dogs outside and our shed door is on the patio, shed is blowing over, neighbor ladies garbage cans have blown all over, go try to help her get the garbage cans in. Still gracefully crying tears off my chin.

from her daughters car I can hear. "Like a G6, like a G6."

Today is a shitty day!

tip tuesday!

I owe this tip to my Mom.

Ya, know the junk you get in your liquid laundry detergent cup. The coagulated junk that dries and coats that nice little plastic number you pour your detergent into your washer with. Just fill it up and place the entire thing in your washer with your dirty clothes and wash away and it comes out sparkling clean and no funk around your cup.

OOOOO.. simple pleasures!

funnel cake or fornicate?

Sam and I were at the hockey game with some of our friends on Saturday night and there is nothing better @ the Maverik Center than their funnel cakes.. I am a fan. Here is how our conversation went.

Debbie: "Sam, will you PLEASE go get me a funnel cake???? PLEASE?"

Sam: "Yes" and than he stands up to get past people ya know how ya dowhen you are sitting in a crowd, making EVERYONE stand up so you can slip by.

Alison: "Sam, Where are you going?"

Sam: "Debbie, Wants a funnel cake?"

Alison "You are going alone" raised eyebrows and giggle.

Debbie: "Yes, he can go alone, I can't go my feet are KILLING me!"

Alison: Well, that should be fun for you Sam, have a good time?" sam walks past everyone else..

Sally to Alison: "Where did Sam go?"

Alison: "He said Debbie wanted to fornicate, so he is going somewhere?"

Debbie: Laughing HARD... "He did NOT say Debbie wants to Fornicate he said Debbie wants a funnel cake.."

well I got my funnel cake and it was about as good as fornicating!

Family!

There are times in my adult life that a lot of time goes by and I don't see my Mom, Dad, Sister, Brother or Nieces and Nephews etc. etc. etc. and it's not that I don't think of them every single day, and that I don't want to see them it's just that life happens. I have been very very lucky lately to be able to spend some time with them. I have forgotten how wonderful it can be and how amazing these people I call my family are. Here are a few highlights of my last couple of weeks. I truly was handed a pretty damn good deck of cards with my family cards. It was Nolan's 75th Birthday. My Mom had a party for him. It was fun to get to see and meet Nolans family again. Nolan is recovery slowly but surely and he is so good for my Mom.. We love him! He also had the cutes centerpieces EVER for his party!

Cassidi and I rocking the juicy red lip trend going on right now! This is a TERRIBLE picture of Nick and Brock at the Jazz game. Nick sporting his new jersey and Brock sporting his new mouth full of braces.

Grandma and grand daughter and cute little Grand puppy, winnie!

Three generations.. This is my Mom, who I am her child 100%. I can go in her kitchen and open a drawer and know exactly what will be there because my kitchen is the same way, I worry about the same stuff she worries about and let me tell you my Mom and I NEVER leave our house with out our dishes done or our bed made because that's what my Great Grandma Taylor always use to tell my Mom.. I love this lady and I love who she has made me. Cassidi has no idea that she is also going to be JUST like the other two women in this photo with her.

*side note. look at these cute centerpieces that my Mom and myself made for Nolans 75th birthday party. I KNOW THEY ARE SO CUTE!

Blogging Blues!!

I don 't know if I have blogging blues or a boring life. Yes, stuff has happened the last few weeks I just can't think of anything charming and cute to say about them so...
stay tuned..

p.s. Cassidi wrecked my car while hers was in the shop getting fixed. This family needs a money tree right now!

Wood..

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck, if a wood chuck could chuck wood!!!
or
How much wood could Brock and Debbie chuck if Brock and Debbie could chuck wood? the answer. NOT VERY DAMN MUCH.
For Spring Break Brock and I went and spent 2 nights in Idaho with my Dad and Sister and Brother. One morning I went over to my brothers Mikes to help him.
*side note. Something that I don't blog about much is that my brother, Mike, has terminal cancer. He has multiple myeloma and to put a long story short he is very very sick and has a hard time doing most things let alone chop wood.
So Mike can't really swing an ax right now and he needed some wood split to burn. Well Brock and I did about 20 pieces of woods and let me tell you it was so hard work and I have not been able to move for two days because I have been so sore!!! Brock and I had a FABULOUS time in Idaho with my family. I can't believe how much fun we had up there in the home of Napoleon Dynamite. Things we did.

• toured a Mink Farm.


• went to the hot pots.


• played Mexican train. (my Dad won every game)


• went to my sister's Michelle's


• helped my brother Mike, (Brock even dusted)


• sat in my Dad's truck while he got a speeding ticket.


• ate to much

any way it was a fun different Spring Break for us and it was WONDERFUL to spend time with my family, however next time you chuck wood.... take advil!

Random Days...

This morning I was thinking to myself that since we got back from Colombia our lives have been kinda quiet and non eventful... then I thought... wait a second... the hell it is.. haha. Our "quiet" is very busy compared to others I know. Here are some random pics with a few words about the last couple of weeks since we got back from vacation.

Debbie has always wanted to paint our bedroom and bathroom. We finally broke down and painted what she calls "sand" color and gloss white trim and flat white ceilings. Whatever color it is it looks wonderful... she has quite the eye and incredible taste... I have none so we make a great match lol. The 2 pictures below she just had matted and framed a couple of weeks ago and now we have a home for them. The first one is one we bought in Colombia... tons of art work with chubby people for some reason down there. The second picture is artwork from a trip Debbie made to Fiji several years ago.

Our lil Brock had his 13th birthday!!! He is now officially a teenager... man how time flies. He is quite spoiled.... he got a flat screen TV from us and his dad bought him a Kinect for his Xbox so he has been playing video games for weeks with that new set up. Debbie took him to IFly in Ogden Utah. Its a wind tunnel and they teach you how to fly... so to speak. Here is the link.. it is the coolest thing. Ifly Link

Of course its St Patties day in March and we always celebrate with our buddies up in Logan. We love our little pocket of friends up there. It makes for a great date night to run up and have dinner with the buds.

Its starting to get a little warmer so I took the flannel nighty off my little yellow rocket (Victory Hammer), cleaned it up and shot around the neighborhood for 10 minutes vibrating every window as I roared by. LOVE IT... but it was too cold for this fair weather rider... back in the garage it went.

Poor Cassidi had an accident a few days ago and crashed her car. Cass is fine, thank goodness, but her car is NOT. She called me crying right after it happened and I said "have you called your mom" she said "NO" so I called Debbie and she drove down to the accident.. it was only a mile down the road by Brock's school. I found out later she called me first because "I am nicer and was afraid of mom" haha. So Cass is driving Debbie's Yukon for now and poor Debbie is stuck at home with out transportation. But tonight, we go get the Mercedes. Super fast car with a big V8 stuffed under the hood. Debbie wants to race me on the bike... she thinks she could take me... I laugh in her face.. bring it on...

So last night, Monday, we were sitting in the living room and decided to go shopping at Costco. We bought a few things and we lost Cass for a few minutes. She was hiding from us as you can see... crazy girl. Quick note about Costco.... I dont think we have EVER left that place with out spending at least 100 bucks... we are suckers when we go here.

After Costco and after Sushi... Cassidi and her boyfriend Alex said "lets all go bowling" so we went and Cassidi kicked some ass and Debbie tied me at 120. The W is Debbie.... she has a stage name.. Wanda haha and I call her Wicked Wanda. Everywhere we go where they ask her name for food or whatever she says "Wanda" so when the clerks come out with food and yell "WANDA!!" we know its her... she cracks me up. (we have a friend named Wanda so if you read this it has nothing to do with you) :)

In March every year gas prices go CRAZY and so does my work. Debbie calls it "Maverik March Madness". She found a couple of places she wants to send me to during this time every year... one of them is a man convent up in Eden that she threatens me with HA. My phone rings constantly and I work 7 days a week for a month or two. I feel bad but it is what it is and always happens this time of year... and I probably have hitmen in 8 states after me. Debbie has actually been very patient with my work this year and its been UGLY as you know.

So this last picture is a depiction of exactly how we feel after the last number of weeks. Winnie... we feel the same way!!

In other News.

This and That...

• We painted our Master Bedroom and Bathroom. LOOKS FABULOUS
• Brock turn 13. For 10 months of my life all 3 of my kids are teenagers.
• I have had a bad bad stomach since we have been home from Colombia. I probably have a tape worm.
• My hair is blond again and I got my Spring injections. Feels so good! :-)
• For dinner tonight we are going to the Brazilian grill at the Gateway in Salt Lake. It's a business thing.
• We are trying a new church this Sunday with some friends from Layton.
• I have eaten Sushi 3 times this week. Maybe I have been poisoned and that is why my stomach is so bad.. Nope I am back to the tape worm from Colombia.
• Cassidi got her itinerary for Costa Rica. She is going to have the best time.
• For Brocks Birthday we took him to Ifly in Ogden, Utah and it was the bomb. It is a wind tunnel and you kinda sky dive.. COOL.
• My Mom has to have back surgery on April 11th. I am going to go spend a couple weeks with her and Nolan to help her out. My poor Mom.
• George may be the World Worst Dog.
• Steven Tyler is really really sexy on American Idol. He is my guilty pleasure.
• We got all new door knobs and light fixtures for our bedroom and they also look FAB.
• It feels SO SO SO SO SO SO Good to be at home for a couple weeks and not do ANYTHING.
• BYU plays tonight against Florida in the NCAA. and it is hard for me NOT to cheer for BYU because they are a Utah team but I really dislike them enough that I am on the fence.
• I went to lunch with my cousins and my childhood friends yesterday. It was so fun.
• I walked through Lowe's with my zipper undone on Sunday. I mean I walked ALL THE WAY THROUGH LOWE'S FOR QUITE SOMETIME.

so now you know!

Name Change.

So, I waited about 3 years to legally change my name to Campbell, because I wanted to make sure Sam and I worked out.. ha ha. That is not the reason, it was because we are always going out of the Country and I didn't want to send my passport in and not be able to go on a trip. Well little did I know if you wait longer then 2 years after you are married it is just a bigger headache. So now I am knee deep in Social Security, Passport, Bank, and DMV paperwork...

I know don't be jealous!!

Welcome to Fantasy Island.

and the trip continues. The last leg of our trip was on the Island of Mucura, at a resort call Punta Faro. It an entire different blog to tell you of the adventure of getting there in a boat. We got soaked and let me tell you. If you EVER find yourself going on a small boat for 2.5 hours to an island with 40 of your husbands co workers and on a sheet of paper you read sometime it mentioned "you may want a rain coat for the boat ride", by all means take a rain coat and DON'T wear ALL WHITE WITH NO UNDER GARMENTS!! It is a little too Spring Break 1987!

Sam and I getting ready to ride a boat to PARADISE. Me in my shiny cloroxed white nautical outfit looking all fresh and ready for a beautiful small boat ride. HA HA HA LITTLE DID I KNOW!UMMM, about 4 minutes into the boat ride!! :-) The other thing to remember is we took this boat ride to the island during the day but our return boat ride was at 4 in the morning in a pitch black ocean and 8 foot waves!!! Now that was even more interesting! and OMYGOD, Welcome to every dream you ever have about an Island getaway. I seriously could not quite talk when we stepped off this boat! It is THAT gorgeous! The service in Colombia was the best I have ever had. I did not EVER touch my luggage once it was packed. It was put in our rooms for us, taken out of our room and just magically appeared where ever we were. It was the bomb.

Our first few minutes onto he island. We didn't even get our luggage before everyone hit the beach and had our first happy hour. We were the first Americans to be at this resort. It was AMAZING. there were bells on our cabanas that we rang and they brought us drinks. PARADISE! They have a no key policy at this resort. NO locks on your room doors, loved it. No keys to worry about and we had NO problem at all!A LITTLE MORE PARADISE!

The culture. This island is in the Guiness Book of World Records for the most densely populated island in the World. 1500 people on an acre YES, an acre!!. It is a little hard to look at and a little hard to imagine living like these people but they are happy and they don't know a difference. Most of the people that live on this island work on the surrounding islands at the resorts. It is a lot more bizarre to see it in person. 800 kids live on this island...

The food, MORE SEAFOOD... lol. Some of our group did not like seafood, I have no idea what they ate for 2 weeks! The local village.

My sweet husband. I have to say right now that Sam and I have spent A LOT of time together the last month. On top of this trip remember we did Amtrak through Colorado so in 3 weeks we spent almost every day ALL day together and Not one argument, not one dis agreement. We are the best traveling partners you have ever seen not to mention life partners!

Sam went and toured the island with out me. I don't want to complain because I was in Paradise but I got SICK on this trip, Pneumonia sick. So I was in bed coughing up a toe nail and Sam was off kissing this turtle somewhere.

the rooms!!!

So without going on and on and on about this vacation I will end it here. I seriously could write for weeks about our experiences and the fun stories and the beautiful scenery and the great people but I think you probably get the point. Priceless vacation, priceless people, and priceless memories. Thank you Maverik, what a GREAT experience!

Cartagena?

Who would have thought Colombia, fun as hell, spectacular food, architectural wonder, SAFE?

Yea, NOT what we thought when they threw Colombia out of their hat. We thought, drug lords, guns, kidnappings, etc.. etc. about every bad thing you could think of a place. Ten years ago that was a pretty vivid picture of Colombia but now it is pretty much a mecca of everything you want. I have simply never been so surprised of how charming and up to date and wonderful a place could be. It was far better then I EVER imagined. However it is hard to communicate, order food, or shop because it is few and far between to find someone that speaks English but who cares when you are in paradise! The 3 nights we spent in Cartagena was by far the most up scaled. The hotel we stayed at was the nicest in town, it was like a 5 star hotel in Los Angeles. Had EVERYthing and then some.

It was Amazing because we would be walking down the street and think this is the neatest street in the entire place and we would turn the corner and it was even more charming and more beautiful. Seriously!!! Colombia!!!

this is a picture of Sam and I with the "new city" of Cartagena behind us. We stayed in the "old city" which is surrounded by walls. The new city is a CITY, a HUGE city and we were told that it would be safest if we stayed in the old part of town. So we did and it is so charming and unbelievable. What a great, luxurious 3 nights we stayed here. LOVED IT! I seriously felt like I was in Spain, these really small streets with vibrant building on them. I walked down these streets and tried to picture it back in the pirate days and how rough it could have been. It has a real New Orleans feel to it.
Tracey and Larry at La Cevicheria. I loved this food.

The pool 2 the Sofitel. It was so darn hot during the day this is the only place to hang out. Cartagena is on the ocean and has a HUGE beach all along it but we did not venture to the beach. They say that you get so harassed by vendors that it is not worth going to the beach in Cartagena. So this part of the trip we pooled in!

the food was to DIE for..Colombia has a real African feel. So take Spain, Africa, and New Orleans and mix it all together. I have never been any where I have felt so foreign. There are very few white people around and the women in Colombia are GORGEOUS. It is hard not to stare at these people because they are so pretty. The Merchandising group at the Yacht club for the last lunch in Cartagena before we went to Punta Faro!

The "old city" of Cartagena is surrounded by a wall. With forts and cannons and stuff all around it. It was to protect it from pirates in the old days. Now they say if you stay within the "old city" of Cartagena you are safe and when you go out side the walls it is a HUGE city.

More pictures of our hotel. In the 1600's it was a monastery. Carriage ride around Old City Cartagena at night. Was one of my favorite things to do. The city comes ALIVE 2 night. People ALL over just walking and eating and drinking and dancing and sitting in parks.

I am leaving so much out of this blog but how do you put into a blog of one of the best places I have ever been and tell everyone how wonderful it is. If you ever get the chance to go to Cartagena, Colombia don't just go... GO and marvel at every second spent!

the difference between all three places we went was so broad that it seriously felt like we had been on 3 different vacations. The bus ride between the first place we were at and Cartagena was brutal, 6 hours, but it wouldn't be an Adventure if it was easy!